7.03.2012

short stories: the train ride

Finally the train pulled up and we boarded. Somehow I expected the people on the train to be unfriendly. The foreignness of the country, culture, and view helped my already clammy shell to cement shut. We came to a slow, screechy halt and more passengers boarded. A pudgy, middle-aged couple was suddenly seated in front of me. All I remember is that the gentleman began talking; his forwardness must have astounded me so much that I went blank for a few moments and just smiled out of politeness.

The haziness began to clear and soon I heard him talking about traveling and food. He addressed me and my cousins, his voice booming above the noise of the churning rails beneath us. He was funny and lively and friendly. I felt he was almost out of place in the train full of somber, frowning faces. A few flashing and surprised glances were pointed our way as the dialogue loudly continued. Was it unusual for strangers to converse on trains? He told us he was going with his wife to a special restaurant for some curry mein (noodles). It was a wonderful bowl of mein, very delicious. He uttered the directions, most of which I forgot in half a second.

Eventually our stop came; we all stepped off. I can't remember seeing him disappear into the crowd, but I still do remember that moment. The way he loosened my clammy shell with a multitude of words and helped to introduce me to a foreign country.

10 comments:

  1. "It was a wonderful bowl of mein, very delicious." There's something about this line that I love! This story is perfect. :)

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  2. I love your writing! You explain everything so well that it almost seems like you're there...

    xoxo,
    Rachel Nicole @ Summer Breeze

    http://rachyracheshobbycorner.blogspot.com/

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  3. I love the way you write, and I love this story. This line is my fave, I think: "The way he loosened my clammy shell with a multitude of words and helped to introduce me to a foreign country."

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  4. It is an excellent short story, Kimberly. Sounds like you got the inspiration from the commuter train ride from Port Klang? :D

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    1. Haha, most certainly! It's a true story from the train ride we took in Malaysia! ;)

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  5. Perfect travel story Kimberly!

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  6. this story is just wonderful. you are a very talented writer dear.

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  7. Awesome story Kimberly! Very well written! Love it! :)

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