After countless pins onto my dream workplace board on pinterest, I have finally begun to create my very own reality. With the help of my dad's carpentry skills, we were able to purchase some lumber and shelf brackets at home depot and put these up last week. They already cut the wood into two pieces at home depot, so all I did was spray paint the brackets gold (I have learned that gold spray paint is my new favorite thing) when we got home. Normal people shouldn't be this happy because of some wooden shelves, but I've learned to accept I'm not normal.
And to set myself apart from all those perfectionists on pinterest, I decided to leave my desk as messy as it ever is. But just to keep it real, it's usually much, much worse.
The reality that is my life lately has been extremely unsettling. I feel like I'm watching myself make jewelry, paint, and decorate, but that I'm somehow separate from this person who is trying very hard to become an artist. This dejected feeling arose poignantly when I realized last week at college orientation that I will probably be in school for at least three more years in order to get my degree. A four year degree turned five years long due to having to be a transfer student.
For the first time in my life, I have begun to question education. The importance of getting a degree eludes me as I see the years of work stretching before me -- repeat classes, unsettling critiques, being measured against other artists with an ugly ruler.
I wish I could just hit fast forward and graduate.
I know there's a reason for this next chapter in my life. Whether it be graduating or not graduating; becoming an artist or not. I feel more uncertain than ever. And for the first time, I think I'm going to be trudging through. But we all need to do a little trudging once in a while.
Have any of you readers felt this way about school? I'm truly interested in your thoughts.
shirt: free people // jeans: altar'd state // shoes: steve madden
I have never seen someone scoop up so many tablets at once (my thoughts as a lady balanced nearly seven or eight of them in her arms). Black Friday is not something I jumped at participating in the past few years, but this year Michael and I finally decided to give it a try. And I must say, Wal-Mart can get a little scary what with officers and red tape. You really have to be aggressive to get what you want, but thankfully, since there was nothing I really wanted, I got to observe the madness from a safe distance. We left Wal-Mart with a modest Christmas wreath while most people walked out with plasma TVs and tablets. Rather comical, if you ask me. I think our cashier agreed.
I hate to say it, but sign me up for online shopping over that any day. Saving money in the comfort of my own home sounds like a fantastic deal.
Other than those after-holiday festivities, though, we have been decorating the house with Christmas cheer and bundling up with blankets to protect from the cold. There's something about wearing comfy sweaters and boots that makes me happy.
You know what I've missed? Photoshoots. And friends. I know that sounds depressing and filled with self-pity, but the truth is, moving is hard. So when lifelong friends fly halfway across the country just to visit and help you move and take photos, it means a whole lot. It is probably obvious that posting these pictures is long overdue, as the trees are more brown than green, and coats are the preferred clothing now-a-days. Oh, warm weather. I miss you when my fingers go numb.
As far as life goes, I am officially unemployed, but very happy about it as I get ready for school. And the holidays. And Christmas shopping, cookie baking, etc. And painting. So much free time! On a scale of one to ten, I would say free time is an eleven. Probably my favorite thing ever.
In other news, I have decided to finally start drafting some paintings for the dreamt of paper store I would love to someday actually create rather then daydream about. And it's been going well. So far there's a 50/50 ratio of paintings that are completed and kept and half completed and thrown away. Not so bad, in my book.
We shall see. We shall see. (one more). We shall see.